Hutton Honors College

"...and she's the lady that I'm...well... trying to 'spend more time with.'"

One hardly expects a man in his eighties to be discussing romantic fantasies with a group of teens and twenty-somethings. And contributing recent anecdotes. Yet this is exactly what Floor Friend Robert Boyer does with the students living on Forest B3. The Allies, Fellows and Friends (A/F/F) Program, run by the IU Division of Residential Programs and Services, pairs faculty, professional staff and community members with residence hall floors or living units. The floor Ally, Fellow or Friend and the floor residents determine the individual scheduling of events and the amount of interaction. Boyer, the Floor Friend on Forest B3 and Read Beck 4, is one of the more fascinating persons involved in this program.

A Baptist minister/scholar, Boyer completed his master's degree in social sciences at the University of Chicago and then moved on to study other diverse topics, such as Buddhism and meditation, on his own. That particular study, interestingly enough, was initiated while he was an imprisoned conscientious objector during World War II. Later, he became the campus minister at Penn State for twenty-five years. He came to Bloomington in 1985 and joined the floor friend program in 1987. "My profession, since 1960, has been spending time with students," elaborates Boyer, "particularly since 1990, when I retired and went on a reduced income. It was good to join a program with a meal ticket. I also like spending time with students, although it was easier in 1987, when each dorm had a cafeteria. I should also note that several times at my request, I have been assigned to academic floors, and these have been by far the most enjoyable."

Boyer has proven to be a fount of knowledge and innovative ideas to the residents of Forest B3. "Robert's a great release for the floor," notes Jeff Kolski, who helps run the Floor Friend program for 3B, "He brings the floor together. There are some people on the floor who I only see during meetings with Robert. I think he has made it possible for several friendships on the floor to occur because of his meetings." Boyer generally meets with his floors twice a week, once for dinner and once for an activity. Three B's first activity with Boyer was a dream interpretation session. After a brief overview of the subject, Boyer tackled several dreams provided by students. One student told him of a dream concerning Zeus and an interstate highway that he had had two years prior to college. Boyer then proceeded to discern this student's major and internal thought processes through an incredible string of logic and interpretation, despite knowing nothing about the student before that moment. "Paying attention to your dreams can contribute to your survival and your success," says Boyer. "Place no limits on the breadth and depth of your awareness." After the initial instruction and interpretation, he encouraged the rest of the participants to interpret each other's dreams using several basic guidelines that he had set forth: nothing in a dream is literal, dreams reveal your thoughts in your subconscious, and recent events may appear in your dreams metaphorically.

Boyer alternates game nights, during which he teaches things such as Mexican dominoes and Rummikub, with "educational nights," during which he hosts events like the dreaming session or discussions. A student of Aldous Huxley, Boyer is most fond of discussing the concept of "Ends and Means," but discussion topics have ranged from the nature of love to the uses of blinking. "Robert creates an environment in which we all feel that our opinions are valid; we all have something to contribute," says Phil Johnson, a resident of Forest. "Robert is a great mentor for everyone in our community," says Josh Malarsky, the Forest Quad vice president of finance and B3 community leader, "I look forward to each of his programs and to having discussions with him at our weekly planning meetings. It's amazing to think about how much he knows and how good he is at sharing his knowledge in an academic setting."

A recent discussion of love with about fifteen members of B3 dealt with the four Greek words for love which are (in order of "value"), Storge which is synonymous with familiarity, Eros, which deals with romance and desire, Philia, which is friendship, and Agape, which is a godlike, unconditional love that is almost impossible for humans to master. Boyer was married for 44 years, and he used his considerable experience in that field to impart some truly important ideas about love that are not often heard by college students: "In the long run, there is more joy in giving love than in receiving love." He also claimed to have recently been in the possession of Eros, the more "physically desirous" side of love, an idea with which the floor was rather familiar. More recently, he sat down with a group of about ten students for a reading of Rumi's poetry (Rumi was a 13th century Indian poet). Boyer says he introduced Rumi because "having gotten to know the core group of B3, [he] thought that [Rumi] was our kinda guy."

While many students enjoy having Boyer as a friend and an educator, he also feels that IU students have had a very large influence on his life and on the way he approaches living. "The most obvious thing is that they make me think," he says. "They teach me things." The relationship Boyer has formed with IU students is symbiotic, with both sides benefiting greatly from the experience. Boyer always thanks students for their kindness and contributions to his life. And in his own way, Boyer contributes to the creation and distribution of truth.

"The ends never justify the means; the means always determine the end," he says. "Contribute to the creation and distribution of beauty, kindness, and truth. Enjoy your life, but remember, only the truly examined life is truly worth living."

Jon Agley

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